We have been thrown into our lives, for better or worse. No one asked for it, but our habits and ways travel onward with us. Therapy gives us an opportunity to examine ourselves--who we've become and what we carry with us. Understanding is an opening for change. Our past plays a big role in who we are but it doesn't have to determine who we become.
Each of us sees the world through a unique eyepiece. At times, our lens may have a depressive film or it may be darkened or obscured by soot or fog. What we perceive feels very real because it's all we know. A therapist is like an eye-doctor who continually works with you to find a good prescription, helps you to clear, adjust, focus and refocus the optic from which you see the world.
We can be our own worst enemy without knowing it. It is chilling to witness the harsh punishment many of us unleash upon ourselves. At times, it may feel justified-you're teaching yourself a lesson. But there's no lesson learned. Therapy unveils the crueler aspects of our relationship to ourselves. Ideally, the punitive part can become more nurturing; and the wounded part can come to feel more worthy of care.
Everyone needs a pause-a place think, feel and take breath. Our society is one that emphasizes getting things done-the destination, not the journey. Not feeling but doing. You're expected to act-to produce. Therapy is a haven from all that. It's an opportunity to speaking frankly, to express and discover how you feel. Having done that, you become freer in choosing how you want to act.
Love is thrilling because it kindles our emotions. What a breathtaking prospect... to make your way across the great barrier that separates you and the person you care for and desire. Therapy can help you develop the emotional intelligence you need to make romantic relationships work. It's a sort of knowledge that can't be learned from a book.
The greatest barrier to love is the fear of it...fear of rejection, abandonment, disappointment, opening old wounds. Our automatic responses kick in for protection. That usually means we run from the possibility of being hurt. In therapy, we examine that knee jerk reaction in slow motion. Over time, you are more at ease when old fears and patterns resurface. You develop the confidence that you won't be utterly crushed by making yourself vulnerable.